Thoughts on Writing – Part 17

23 Thursday Feb 2012

Posted by in Novel - A Distant Threat of Moonlight, Writing

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Since February the 5th when I announced the draft of A Distant Threat of Moonlight was finished I have spent my time reading it back through. The last couple of weeks have been difficult. I have found myself unable to put the draft down and walk away from it. Most days I have been tinkering with the odd word or sentence and moving paragraphs about. This is a combination of a number of common problems at this stage in the process. Confidence or lack of it in the finished product. Being able to look at pages that were written awhile back with the experience I have since gained. Fear of rejection. Fear of the impact that rejection may have.

On the positive side I have a finished product that I am proud off. It’s not perfect, but neither am I. Having read the novel again I am okay with it. Despite this I have experienced at times an overwhelmingly feeling of sadness and depression. I should be pleased but I feel empty. I have lived and breathed this project for the best part of three years and did in fact give up more than once during this period. I am glad I did find the strength to pick myself up and return to it but I found like many before me it is so easy to start, it is the finishing that is the hard part. This evening the letting go of it I am finding even harder. You would think I would be glad to see the back of it. I have a very small piece to write between two particular chapters tomorrow and then I know I can leave it.

It has crossed my mind to burn it or whatever the digital equivalent is. This evening despite the last twenty-four hours and the constant lack of sleep this year I cannot see that happening now. It is reading well and at times some paragraphs are making me smile because I can say hand on heart I nailed it during those sentences. For now that is good enough. My ambition was to reach the finish line and I have crossed it. I may have staggered and crawled over it with bleeding fingertips and a heart and soul that deserves better days ahead but I finished.

I am approximately twenty-five percent into my next novel with a couple of ideas for future books. I have no shortage of material. I am not relying on this paying the bills. I would however like this to take me away from the day job and free up more time for writing. To this end I now have to pick myself up that little bit more and begin the process of putting it out there and taking the hits. I’m smiling as I type. Are we all mad to put ourselves through this?

Thoughts on Writing – Part 16

20 Monday Feb 2012

Posted by in Writing

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Part 16 of these random outpourings on writing. To celebrate I may be less than serious here while attempting to make a serious point. Please bear with me.

I read a recent posting regarding an age old question, at what point do you call yourself a writer? This may appear an odd one but as someone living and working in the western economy where it is a constant battle not to be catergorised on the basis of some badly thought out notion of people’s worth in relation to financial and/or popular success, it is one that comes up often enough. I had to take a moment there to read that last sentence back as it’s a long one even for me.

I am well paid to know about IT. It’s what I do. Work and commuting take up twelve hours a day, five days a week. However, it’s not what I am. When people ask me what I do I don’t say, I’m in IT. The only other thing I could say to kill the conversation quicker – for me anyway – is I’m a tax inspector. I know a tax inspector and that is a devastating opener at parties. If you ever want rid of some unwanted attention at a party, that’s the line to use. Mind you God help you if that’s their thing. Anyway, I know a great deal concerning all things IT. The word geek in fact springs to mind, but I don’t want to discuss broadband or wireless connections thank you very much. Believe me, it’s really not that entertaining.

However if I say I’m a writer, well that is a lot more interesting and indeed quite challenging. That’s putting yourself out there, on the ledge with the pigeons perhaps but hey what’s the worst that can happen? I always maintain I don’t cross bridges, I jump off them. So, if you say you are a writer then you have to face those difficult questions don’t you? Well actually no, you don’t. If people wish to believe that only when you are making a living from writing you can call yourself a writer, well that’s fine by me. I never try to convince them otherwise.

It’s a funny thing writing. Well maybe not when I do it but it is different. If you are at a party and tell someone you are a painter, an artist even, that’s usually accepted and people treat it for what it is. Say you’re a writer and it’s, well you’re hardly the next JK are you? Would Van Gogh be anymore of an artist if he had sold well during his lifetime I ask? Of course he wouldn’t. He was always the best but your experts and your critics and let us be honest here even the public were playing catchup. That’s the way it was and that’s the way it is today. If you are going to be a writer you had better get over it. People are just not going to get how talented you really are. That’s life.

If you write, then treat it as a positive thing. Believe in it. Walk the talk so to speak. Take the conscious decision to stop hiding the fact or being coy about it and say this is what you do. People may not like it, people may think it’s total nonsense but for better or worse, this is what you do. You are either a writer or you’re not and there is no room for standing in the middle apologising for it.

As anyone who has ever glanced down a list of a thousand whatevers you need to do, see or hear before you die will tell you, there’s a lot of dross out there not worth the time of day chasing down and ticking off. A thousand books to read before you die? Kill me now. That fact doesn’t stop people creating and putting it out there and neither it should. Embrace it. I do. Being published doesn’t mean your work is suddenly great but it is going to feel so good should it happen. If it does you can be happy in the knowledge that it may end up in someone’s bucket list – either to read or to skip – and what greater reward is there than that?

So I’m not on the supermarket shelves at two for four pound yet, or buy two and get a third free for that matter but I will know I’ve made ‘it’ as a writer – whatever ‘it’ is – when that day comes. I could go as far to say that that is my ultimate goal. Well that and the movie obviously.

To finally end on a serious note here none of the above actually matters. I wanted to write so bad I ended up having to start as that was the only thing left to do. The novel was something I felt I had to write, to see whether I could complete. For better or worse it’s what I do. I am a writer. Right I’m off to install a friends router. It’s okay. I’m in IT you know.

Years Of Lightning

18 Saturday Feb 2012

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Years of Lightning is a longer piece I have been working on over the last month and have decided this evening to let it go. I have other stuff to write so it’s time to put it out and move on. This one has proved a struggle and when I read it back I feel this is reflected in the language. I recommend reading out loud if possible.

http://adistantthreatofmoonlight.wordpress.com/2012/02/18/years-of-lightning/

 

Liebster Blog Award

18 Saturday Feb 2012

Posted by in Life, Writing

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I have been nominated by http://lostupabove.wordpress.com/
for the Liebster Blog Award. I am honoured to receive this award from Steph coming so soon after her nominating me for the Versatile Blogger Award.

Liebster is German & means ‘dearest’ or ‘beloved’ but it can also mean ‘favourite’ & the idea of the Liebster award is to bring attention to blogs with less than 200 followers all in the spirit of gathering more connections

Show your thanks to the blogger who gave you the award by linking back to them.
Reveal your top picks for the award and let them know by leaving a comment on their blog.
Post the award on your blog.
Bask in the love from the most supportive people on the blogsphere – other bloggers.
And, best of all – have fun and spread the karma.

I would like to pass this award to the following on the basis they are all very different and I enjoy reading their blogs:

http://darkestangelica.wordpress.com/

http://naza733.wordpress.com/

http://bipolarmuse.wordpress.com/

http://peterhobbs1.wordpress.com/

hhttp://thepoeticgoblin.wordpress.com/

Versatile Blogger Award No. 3

17 Friday Feb 2012

Posted by in Life, Writing

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Thank you to http://lostupabove.wordpress.com/ for nominating me for the “versatile blogger” award. This is very much appreciated. I have been awarded previously but will provide a different set of random facts about me.

The rules for the Versatile Blogger Award are :

1. Nominate 15 fellow bloggers.

2. Inform the bloggers of their nomination.

3. Share 7 random things about yourself.

4. Thank the blogger who nominated you.

5. Add the Versatile Blogger Award pic on your blog post.

Seven random things about me:

I like Vodka

I sat beside a famous actor on a plane and asked him if he was a footballer.

I cannot do accents

My favourite living author is Haruki Murakami

I have read all of James Joyce except for Finnegans Wake.

I have every Beatle album in vinyl, cd and also the latest remasters.

I work in IT but consider myself a writer

My 15 nominations are:

http://divinerhythm.wordpress.com/

http://wherelionsroam.wordpress.com/

http://scotzig.wordpress.com/

http://bowendiaries.wordpress.com/

http://fivereflections.wordpress.com/

http://poetryandpersistence.wordpress.com/

http://deidraalexander.wordpress.com/

http://lamehousewife.wordpress.com/

http://daabsentee.wordpress.com/

http://blackswanpoetry.wordpress.com/

http://bipolarmuse.wordpress.com/

http://caeblogs.wordpress.com/

http://peterhobbs1.wordpress.com/

http://pacatatu.wordpress.com/

http://hurdlestohappiness.wordpress.com/

I will now contact everyone to let them know.

Thoughts on Writing – Part 15

14 Tuesday Feb 2012

Posted by in Writing

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I have been looking again at my own writing, partly spurred on by reading other blogs and have come to the conclusion that I feel most comfortable with writing poems and lyrics within a reasonably strict meter. I also like to rhyme wherever possible. This is not a conscious decision. It maybe because I hear words linked to musical phrases as I write them. One of my biggest influences is Bob Dylan and although the bulk of his work is set to music, he very often fits in any number of syllables in a line if it is what he wishes to say. I’m very strict about not doing that. If I cannot say what I want to say within roughly the parameters I have set – or have usually been set for me – then I either find the words or write about something else. I do not set out to write within any particular scheme though. The process is entirely random and can be prompted either by an initial phrase or a sequence of musical notes.

I am likely to end up contradicting myself here so please bear with me. I prefer not to differentiate between poems and lyrics. I do not wish to upset purists but I prefer not to recognise the distinction between the two. Of course I can point to some piece and say that is a poem or that is a lyric but I try not to think consciously about it. To me it is all writing and adding labels only confuses me. Having said that I have a section on my blog entitled lyrics and also one called fragments which looking at it are probably poems. Reading the last few sentences again I am not expressing this well so I need to think about this some more. Lyrics are clearly words I can sing. However, I try to put the same effort and meaning into my lyrics as I would to a poem. I do not consider one being of more worth than the other. I prefer to give them equal status as pieces of work.

Looking at the poems I have published on my blog they tend to be more obscure than my lyrics though others may disagree. Imagery and ultimately obscurity worries me at times. In fact it is a constant worry come to think of it. I have been asked before what I mean by for example ‘I buried every statue in your garden’ or ‘ you’re shaking out my accent to the floor’ or even last week with ‘I’m painting out my dashboard white’. Death by PowerPoint would rapidly become an attractive option to you if you were ever to get me started on this topic. I know what I mean. Whether that is ultimately enough I don’t know.

I may make an effort this year to move into more free form verse and see where that takes me. At the time of writing I do not know whether I will find this satisfying or not. I do like rhyme and phrases that simply flow along with or without music and I invariably end up writing in that particular vein. For now, that’s the way it is.

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